I feel like I no longer have my best friends..

This hurts more than losing family...having none of your close friends..especially my close girl friends not have any contact with me..I know my phone is out of service..but really no response to anything facebook..clearly you have been on. I just dont understand this..this hurts..I feel like these women are my sisters and umm..I guess they dont see me that way. I dont understand it..I know I have not been the best friend..hiding myself and shutting down..but when I finally open up for the first time in my life..people leave..they just stop talking and really caring. I see these girls and they are so full of Christ and thats what this friendship is. maybe thats my problem..I havent made it all about Jesus. Ya Jesus I really need you..and that should be the only thing that matters..